Infinite Stupidity
Sitemap INFINITE STUPIDITY - SO MANY THING DONE JUST WRONG * See also Gianormous_Infinite_BS * see also Infinite_Gratuitous_Violence * see also PLAYER_COMMENTS_ABOUT_BIOSHOCK_INFINITE * see also Infinite BS * see also Columbia Construction * see also Columbia Asylum * see also Columbia's Doom * see also Industrial Revolution BS * see also Burial at Sea ' "The "Ship Of Fools" isn't Columbia, its the game studio, and "Voyage of the Damned" was about any player unfortunate enough to buy Infinite BS." - Augustus Sinclair (Who tells it as 'it is') ' ---- ---- --- --- --- Not Real Great Storytelling : A really GREAT storyteller gets all their facts/logic straight for the settings of their RIPPING GREAT stories. Those who don't bother to even try are just mediocre HACKS. Great Art deals with subtleties which can be ruined by jarring discordances and obviously logic-straining events. If you are presenting a world of such detail, it really doesn't take that much effort to do it right. SO then WHY NOT do it Right ? - As Infinite BS is not Sci-Fi, I make much larger allowances for some illogic, and as it is a computer Blast-Fest game. Thus 'story' isn't really a priority, and realism is not of much criticality either. I do criticize when supposedly important Social Issues are made a game element, but are presented as if they were in the magical Land of Oz . --- --- --- A Thought - About What You can Do with $US 200 Million Dollars : Create an amazing Movie like 'The Hobbit', or a mediocre game like Infinite BS ??? (Yes, there were 3 movies costing 200+M each, but I did say movie - and EACH ONE did about $ 1 BILLION gross). Please Compare what an expert visionary can do with such an amount of money, versus ... I don't recall too much mention of whether Infinite BS 'broke even' (perhaps after 10 years of selling at $5 at STEAM ?? ). --- --- --- Comstock is God (Sorry Ken, NOT An American Anything There) ' : Columbia sure seemed to be replicating 'Sodom on the Surface' for it to supposedly claim be ''the New Ark or Eden in the Clouds. Mammon still is King/God. The Prophet is a Charlatan. Idols abound. Maybe this is how the game writers see Religion ? The only real (unintended) "Point Being Made" was that the writers of this game were '''Clueless . Profound Thought (?) : Columbia was run like Ken Levine ran Irrational Games ????? (Naaaaaah) --- --- --- Clueless Game Writers Take on Technology And How It Happens : Fink hadn't a clue (shown magically building unknown things from just seeing them through Tears) and even Edison knew exactly what needed to be done to make the Lightbulb work AND it still it took him nearly a year. Is this game an example of modern ignorance/stupidity, where most people haven't a clue how things work, but assume they do and supposedly how easy it all must be ? Suchong (in BaS) likewise was portrayed as a universal genius/scientist/engineer accomplishing pure miracles. If the writer's ideas of reality are such, then why should the Player care/empathize about any character's motives/intentions/sanity (it'll be just as magic/unreality/fantasy/ludicrous) - which thus makes it likely most Players said "Whatever..." or "Oh yeah that's nice..." for the fourth time to the weirdness, and then for the rest of the game just said ' "SKIP the BS and JUST bring me more things to shoot already" ', and ' "Is that all ? I wan't more neat ways to execute these enemies, and blow them apart" '. Provide Some Consistency with REALITY please. --- --- --- One of the stupid things in Infinite BS was scenes like this : While Booker 20 feet away is obviously approaching in plain sight openly/visibly brandishing a gun (something other civilians don't much do), these NPC Police are unrealistically and absurdly nonreactive, considering their supposed role and the warnings about evil intruders in the city. The designers wanted to present their little Tableaus of 'Columbia' in its normalcy, but did it too much in this moronic and lazy way. They wanted the player near enough to have a good closeup look at the scene. Unfortunately having the 'people' (something that should be the more important element) react at a distance would have the result of it all dissolving much too soon into violence, which would ruin the effect they wanted. A superior game might've had Booker AND Elizabeth keep assuming disguises (automatically grabbing and wearing lots of odd/amusing/strange stuff and using props), or cause diversions, to get close to their opponents before the mayhem began. The player THEN would be alot more interested in looking over each scene, rather then a just a glance before charging in, guns blazing. We coulda also had ALOT more different reactions from the ambient citizens on the Player's approach (versus run away and disappear, or just cringe in place, when violence started). Add a bit more varying reaction from the OPPONENT NPCs. Columbia is awash in guns, so why not have more ordinary people pull out guns/etc and defend their city from the 'evil doers' ? Clues in the scene might've suggested where the Player should go to get closest (multiple paths causing variations). The player's character then also might not have to be such an absurd 'Bullet Sponge' to handle the constant walking directly into intense weapon fire. A huge opportunity was lost for this game. ---- ---- Absurd crap like this to justify the 'Class Warfare' the game presents in its attempt to portray social ills of 'real' America 1900, NO MATTER how illogical it is for the setting of 'Columbia'. 'Too much shit pushed together' was how one commentator (NOT from one of the ass-licking industry magazine) put it. ---- Laughable Economy - Simpleton Props : Maybe if they had the imagination and writing-competency to explain that : Columbia EXPORTED its manufactured goods (as it flew around the World (like selling guns/ammunition to dictators in banana republics) to get money and supplies to keep the city operating (and maybe that Columbia itself did alot of robbing various backward parts of the World) --- THEN it might have made alot more sense. More than one commentary about the game also said : How thrown-together the whole game was (in story and content), with a general lack of coherency/consistency and "trying to be too clever" with too many ideas stuffed into it making it one big mess. ---- ---- Skyline system is moronic, and could only be created by a 'game designer' who shouldn't be allowed to design anything real, as for protection of Public Safety. A transportation system designed by an imbecile or someone severely mentally-damaged by drugs. Good game feature potential were abandoned, story presentation and concept chopped up like coleslaw cabbage, all leaving a mediocre shooter with a harebrained fantasy plot. Awarded a "Failz Minus" ---- ---- NO FURTHER COMMENT IS NECESSARY ---- ---- Total misunderstanding of how balloons and REAL floaty thing in general actually work (We Might as well have had BRICK ZEPPELINS). ---- ---- Various Faux-Scientific Stuff : Inconsistency in their fake 'physics' ... Flip side of the same coin ? Actually with quantum events, Robert was far more likely to be a successful Circus Clown than another Quantum physicist (with the 'change event' going back 9 months before his birth to result in a Y chromosome - thats a whole lot of difference between universes). What isn't mentioned : is how many 'Roberts' and 'Robertos' and 'Robby The Mimes' Rosalind had to look through to find the one anything like herself. ---- ---- Hanging by only 4 or 3 fingers - CLUELESS DEVs ---- ---- ---- ---- ---- ---- --- --- --- Columbia Signage (Signs) Is Excessive BS ? Kalumbia Be Dah Trash ''' : '''Inappropriate - a BIG sign must mean a BIG Business ... right ?? Complicated/Outsized signs for what can only be small businesses (in Columbia which is really a small town), likewise is an absurdity. For all Columbia's grandiosity, seen in the game, it is mostly empty air. Bad Placement - Another issue with Hugified Signs with buildings near each other - big signs at sufficient height can't be seen much when blocked by adjacent buildings - negating their purpose. They also give people looking up from the ground at a sharp angle a neckache, or worse - the sign simply gets ignored). The majority of real world signs are normally to be found closer to the ground, to fall into the normal vision of someone on the street (and smaller also means cheaper to have made - unless bad Fantasy-Economics are in play). Real People, who have signs made, are NOT STUPID. In Columbia, many of the signs LOOK like they were designed by people with a view floating in the air ("artist" who doesn't understand Viewpoint Contexts). It is unlikely someone zipping by on those Skyway paths can look about themselves much, while they are hanging on for their lives (especially as the 'tracks' strangely dip and twist so-much, throwing them about, like a Rollercoaster). People who would see the signs generally will be ON THE GROUND. Too Complicated - If you look at old city photographs you will see that MOST large signs of the era are no more complex than being PAINTED on the flat side of a building (usually in white on a dark solid background for maximum visibility). More complicated signs are usually small because of their significant expense (and placed low, to be readable, seen close). Signs of the 'blade' type stick out at a 45 degrees at a corner so as to be visible down 2 streets. Overdone - Big signs are a cheap game method of creating an affect of "being impressive" (particularly to those who haven't a clue what real world signs at that time should be). This helps Cover up the lack of detail. Unfortunately a huge sign isn't that interesting and doesn't warrant a second look. Having large/HUGE LIT signs could bankrupt a small business (even today). Lack of Detail - On far away 'Prop' buildings, any signs which were much smaller would be unreadable (the idea that there were such signs visible wasn't enough. Representing Visual Perspective with consistency seems a lost concept (again all you have to do is look at real pictures). To be realistic, you would also have to have MORE signs (one big sign is alot less effort for a game developer to make than a realistic cluster of small/normal sized signs). All those cloud effects only partially obscured details at distance, and signs (which are designed for maximum visibility and have a distinctive shape ) are obscured the least, and so cannot really be omitted without the scene looking WRONG. All in all, the presentation of Signage in Infinite BS was overdone crap. --- --- --- Tear Madness ? BioShock Infinite (its all scientific you know ...) takes a turn for the insane for awhile. Example- time-ghost-zombies resurrected by a Banshee time-ghost of Lady Comstock, then you go onto a bridge later and you end up in what looks like an Insane Asylum where Benjamin Franklin's rush at you with crowbars, when a guy wearing giant foghorn ears agitates them by yelling. We coulda had MOST of Columbia be this from the start (to be more Politically Correct for the shooting mass-slaughterin' goodness). But that would have eliminated the 'normalcy' you get to see of Kenny&Co's '1900 ebil-america' Columbia, and it would definitely spoil the milque-toast social evils portrayals they splattered around, while they tried to make the game 'Socially Relevant' to Players, who to be honest, really didn't give a rodents rectum about. --- --- --- Oooh, Primo Colors, The Pretty Colors !!! ... ''' : ''Now Hand ME My Shiney Rotating Blade Thing !!! '' ' Those Lutece 'Particles' are really '''Pills' of Hallucinogenic compounds (which Comstock used -- some combination of native american mushroom chemicals), WHICH makes all of Columbia "Fly", even though nobody ever got off the ground. Perfect explanation - in the MMORPG Rapture story Columbia was just such a wacky 'commune' of cultists 'flyin' in their drugged-out existence. It, of course, eventually 'crashed', resulting in a pack of homicidally murderous psychopaths, which were eventually "put down" like the Rabid Dogs they had become. Perhaps this was all just a cautionary tale broadcast on Rapture TV (Sander Cohen Playhouse) after the side effects of ADAM Abuse became to be known in Rapture. (Elizabeth C. and Booker D. just being characters in a "Reefer Madness" tale.) --- --- --- Sorry In Columbia There Would Be NO Women Police Officers/Constables (even the Nazis did not have Women soldiers) : For a place allegedly claiming to be based on 1900 America (and a rather reactionary element as well), Infinite BS contained alot of gratingly stupid/unlikely/incoherent things -- FAR more Fantasy than anything Bio Shock should be. --- --- --- ' "The Philistine's March" (John Philip Souza wrote it in Response to Comstock's Columbia, and its Destruction) ' : Of course, having Time Travel access thru 'Tears' is a great story crutch, AND lets YOU get to hear later-era songs/music (of which there are many in the game). This allows trying to be 'Cleverly Anachronistic' (and skipping the tough part of imaginatively creating something original for the period). You can then 'sell it' to the typical Players -- who really DON'T care all that much (The "Oh Thats Nice ... But WHERE'S the next thing I get to Shoot and explode its head ???????" demographic.) SHOULDN'T Fink's brother Albert have had to be 'Trolling' (as in fishing) through Tears for a VERY long time (day and night, for years) to find so many Songs ? Its like he just opened every Tear up and there one was , No ? And then he had to be VERY busy writing down the musical scores and lyrics (must've RECORDED them really really well -- maybe a Vox-O-Phone on the end of a long stick ??? -- to allow tediously transcribing them accurately at a later time). Skip all the musician training/performing or music sheet printing -- that's trivial by comparison (Consider just the idea that the slang/new-words of a later era would be unintelligable to the Columbites -- so Albert likley had to modify alot of songs HIMSELF to make them palatable - in particular to satisfy a stuffy bunch of fanatical religious cultists who were just itching to 'Burn' someone 'At the stake'). It is SO simply amazing that he could be looking (through Tears) so many times, and wind up constantly at the right PLACE and at the right TIME to record each of these many musical pieces (and he managed to get WHOLE songs - its kinda hard to market and sell PART of a song, or worse -- ones where YOU 'patch' the missing bits yourself, badly). (( '' He also probably have been aged even more than Comstock by his 'Tear' Exposure. '' )) See, that's the problem with having this 'Time Travel' element - IT introduces endless complications, which can be problematic in a serious game -- forming an increasing raft of Gaffs and Botches, when the writers employ it slap-dash in their story. "Oh, it all just gets taken care of !!!" is easy until the reply comes : "How ? Without turning the whole universe topsy-turvey into some implausible/illogical freakish place to accommodate what YOU say happens in the game -- WHICH IS CLAIMED TO BE A LARGELY NORMAL/RECOGNIZABLE PEOPLE/SOCIETY ?? SO MUCH FOR YOUR "HISTORICAL" RELEVANCY THERE, PAL ..." ' (( '' Note - "Slap-Dash" is slang for inept/half-assed, which also BTW describes what the Infinite BS game was. '' )) --- --- --- '''The Lady Comstock's Handprint - Oh Yes ?! ' : ?? "Lady" is somekind of aristocratic term -- how very American .... *NOT*. (Maybe if the games scenario was set in Edwardian England -- and the Luteces now could talk with Brooklyn accents to set them apart). Amazing all these wondrous Stolen (in Time as well as Space) technologies they managed to work into this game's plot. Handprint Recognition Machinery now ... Have to chop the hand off the corpse (Funny scene of the skeletal arm trying to strangle Booker while he does so, or a more amusing scene of him using it as a back scratcher ... and the inevitable "can I Give You A Hand" joke. 'Have you yet NOTICED that it would have been actually better to have written this whole hack story as a comedy ??? ') --- --- --- That Head (Huge handyman Head when pix shows normal person standing next to it) SO, Supposedly, that (as the story goes) was a normal person put into a 'Handyman' suit ??? Not a rebuilt head by its looks (if they wanted it Big-ified then they coulda wrapped it in metal to enlarge it without enlarging the original person inside). SO, Why IS the head so HUGE ??? (its like 2X each dimension = 8x normal volume) Probably because would look ludicrous if left normal-sized on that body (and be barely visible at the range Players usually see the Handymen - when they are fighting to be able to do 'Headshots'). I might guess that the Handymen were originally to be smaller than that when Infinite BS was produced, AND they (simply) scaled them up to appear more menacing. Maybe it is to make them an easier target -- as the Handyman are such bullet sponges, and quite bothersome when they get in close range to the Player ( NOTE the sniper scope HELPING you get a shot by slowing things down/locking onto the target. It don't work that way in reality.) Not justified as an intended Security operative (there's plenty of other minions of Comstock's Police Stat for that). So a big clumsy worker who does what ?? Giant hands for manhandling huge boxes full of industrial stuff for which there is few customers to warrant the industry ??? A menacing enforcer for the untermenschen serfs/slaves ? The Excuse apparently : To simply to serve as a '''game opponent, similar to the iconic Big Daddy, just another flavor a bit different from that huge paramilitary army. A MMORPG Spoof might have a even larger Mardi Gras sized head. --- --- --- Columbia - The Illogical Pretty Carricature : All those lights in Columbia - light bulbs cost money, so does the electric power for them (someone has to make both -- and that was EXPENSIVE high-tech in the 1890s and decades after that). It also consumed alot of fuel. But Magic Unicorn Tear Powered Stuff made things like that no problem ( ?? Then why didn't they light the building interiors the same way - where it would have made a much bigger improvement ???). It is because the writers just didn't get logical consistent details like that. (The outside looked like a circus, so why not the inside ? Or at least nice and bright ...) They just didn't realize that the tech changes (the effects of which the game was SUPPOSED to be about) should have significantly affected Columbia's society. and driven the story (like the previous game's "Bio Shock was about powerful genetic tech effects upon society). The Racist Cult Police State society was there with or without magic Floatyshit™ and those minor mechanical toys. We could have had : Stealing tech from the Future, Creative cyborg-ish enslavement, Creepy tech worship ... But no, it was just weak social justice warrior crap, ignorance of historic religion, magic faux science story crutches, a cardboard cutout capitalistic economy to force class warfare. THAT was what they ladled out of their 'Witches Caldron of Too Many Half-Arsed Themes '. --- --- --- Infinite BS Game's Faux Unrealistic US Government : When the US Government is paying for something, THEY want to see every detail about it. Paperwork, costs,material everything to the smallest detail. First, the usual schmoozing/talk, political maneuvering and dealmaking beforehand needs to be done upont the prospectus. This usually takes months if not years. Then the working demonstrations, opening of contracts, model/design review, and ton upon ton of blueprints ... BEFORE allocations of any REAL money. It is ANOTHER kind of Fantasy to have ridiculous Wave of the hand Instantness in something pretending to be REAL America (and Real World) and dealing with REAL American government interactions. 3 months ?? Try 3 years (in the Real World things go wrong --- so add another year on there ... minimum) ---- ---- QuantumzWroughtIron.jpg|Sorry, No Humongus Bridges - What's the point of Flying Shit Otherwise?? Realstore1910.jpg|Real Stores are filled with products. Space is expensive. 1900FinksReal2.jpg|Fink's Factory should have looked like this. NoLevine.jpg|There is a problem with 'Just Making Shit Up', when you aren't very good at it. --- --- --- --- --- . .